We can all use a laugh now and then, which is why I am created this Jokes page. Share your favorite jokes with me, ones that relate to teaching college courses. I post the ones that are tasteful.
Are you a redneck college teacher? You might be a redneck college teacher if …
03/10/10 – A reader wrote: A professor is one who talks in someone else’s sleep.
03/10/10 – I found this one on http://www.buzzle.com/editorials/11-23-2001-6234.asp. It is credited to Anisha. Hope you don’t mind, Anisha, but I edited it a bit.
Two friends, college freshmen, decided to party the night before their first chemistry exam. They came to class the next day and explained to their instructor that their car had broken down the night before due to a very flat tire. They said they needed a bit more time to study, which their professor granted.
That evening, both boys stayed up late and crammed until they were sure that they knew just about everything. When they arrived at class the next morning, the two young men were sent to different rooms to take the exam.
They each sat down and read the first question. “For 5 points, list the components of an atom.” At this point, they both thought that this was going to be a piece of cake, and answered the question with ease. Then, the test continued. “For 95 points, tell me which tire it was.”
This humorous story comes from Jokes ‘N Jokes College Jokes
It was the final examination for an introductory English course at the local university. Like many such freshman courses, it was designed to weed out new students, having over 700 students in the class!
The examination was two hours long, and exam booklets were provided. The professor was very strict and told the class that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail. 1/2 hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked the professor for an exam booklet.
“You’re not going to have time to finish this,” the professor stated sarcastically as he handed the student a booklet.
“Yes I will,” replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing. After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except the late student, who continued writing. 1/2 hour later, the last student came up to the professor who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there.
“No you don’t, I’m not going to accept that. It’s late.”
The student looked incredulous and angry.
“Do you know WHO I am?”
“No, as a matter of fact I don’t,” replied the professor with an air of sarcasm in his voice.
“DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?” the student asked again.
“No, and I don’t care.” replied the professor with an air of superiority.
“Good,” replied the student, who quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and walked out of the room